Posted in God, heart, Love, Post Cancer, Uncategorized

Why did I just do that? Motives demystified :)

I don’t know about you but I am so encouraged by the following scripture:

Romans 7:15New Living Translation (©2007)

I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.

(The apostle Paul is so easy to relate to at times.  I am so thankful that he was willing to be real in his writing and shared his struggles.)

How many times have you been in the position where you did not understand your very own actions or reactions to an event, situation or person?  I can so relate to living in complete and utter frustration at times to the way I have acted or reacted.  I have been completely mystified by the choices that I have made in the past when I knew (in my mind) that they were not good for me.

I have recently learned in reading a great book….“The Healing Codes“, that when we are in a heart vs. head struggle, the heart wins every time.  We do not do what we think…….we do what we believe.  I finally see that what I think is VERY different from what I believe and it is my beliefs that dictate my actions and choices.

So where do our beliefs come from?  Remember, everything that we encounter “leaves an impression” on us.  Consequently, we get our beliefs (what lives in our hearts) from a variety of places.  The multiplied impressions that are made over long periods of time, is what we believe. It comes from interactions, the way we are treated, the mistakes that we make, our families and friends.   The Bible admonishes us to guard our hearts ABOVE EVERYTHING!!! Read this verse and contemplate it in the light of this discussion.  Wow, it is a very STRONG statement.

Proverbs 4:23

New International Version (©1984)
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Your heart is so precious, it directs your entire life and what motivates you. Your heart is not your feelings, your feelings are merely a heading on the compass, your heart is your engine or driver.  It propels you towards what you have assimilated as “truth”.  So what if your engine is propelling you towards what you know is not right and healthy for you?  What do you do?  How do you heal a truly broken heart/belief system?

  • All true healing begins with acknowledging you have a problem.  Then bringing them before a loving God.  All “broken heart” issues come from a past hurt or acceptance of misinformation about yourself.  Your God has a correct estimation of you and knows you intimately and loves you.  Ask him to bring forth those broken images and memories and to heal you of the subconscious,  incorrect script that you have accepted into your heart.
  • God will bring forth those instances and situations where you were not valued/ loved properly.  It was in those moments you assimilated an incorrect valuation of yourself.  You bought an untruth, a lie, a bad script.
  • Ask God to heal those memories and help you to see yourself as he does……..worthy of every good gift, whole, integrated and HIS beautiful child.
  • You will most likely also have to do some forgiveness work when you identify the people and situations that hurt you and sold you the bad script.   Go ahead and do it, and repeat often!  Your heart will thank you!!
  • These untruths also block YOU from experiencing God’s LOVE.  God never moves or changes, he is Good all the time.  It is we who have heart issues that block us from experiencing the full love of God.  Once these lies and false beliefs are removed, when God whispers, you will hear him.
  • When the static of all this misinformation is removed, the still, small voice of God is loud and clear!!  YAY!!
I have my PHD. in this……..I picked up a very bad script in my second childhood home.  I was neglected and not valued in this household.  I was treated as a non entity.  What I wanted, thought, needed did not matter.  Through a 10 year process of living in this environment, I bought a bad script that told me…..I did not matter.  And throughout my adult life, I battled this “non entity” stronghold.  It was that stronghold that compelled me to pick the cast of characters I surrounded myself with at the time of my cancer diagnosis.   That’s right I chose the people who eventually abandoned me after my cancer diagnosis.  It was the diminished estimation of my own needs and value that allowed these non supportive people to have a major role in my life.  And of course these people abandoned me, suddenly I had undeniable needs that they were ill prepared to meet.  They stayed within the roles that I had always allowed.  They were not there for my needs, I was there for theirs and now that I was unable to fulfill that, they had no need for me.  
This was a very difficult lesson to learn at a  very difficult time but praise God, I got it!!
God and I work daily to see myself and others as he does.  This process takes time everyday, sometimes I take hours to search and find what lies lurking deep in my heart. I am so much better today, I continue to work in this area daily and help lead others in their own healing of their heart.  Our very lives may depend on these heart issues.
So, I leave you with this question.  What did you do or say this week that was in-congruent with who or where  you want to be?  Some heart surgery may be just what the doctor ordered!!
PS……..I have not arrived, I will probably work on this for the rest of my life.  I can say, I am so much further down the road then I was 2 years ago!!  Thank God!!  It has completely transformed my life!!
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One thought on “Why did I just do that? Motives demystified :)

  1. Wow! Did you get counseling from your pastor? What a blessing! Thank you for sharing, as always, Dawn! That’s a print! (and a distribute!)

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